Friday, August 29, 2014

On Again Off Again

I'm up way too late, so I figured why not blog?  :)

Tuesday, I was low carb all day.  I already blogged about that.

On Wednesday, I had 2 fried eggs on top of spaghetti squash "hashbrowns" with turkey links and coffee.  I didn't have a real lunch, but I did grab 0% plain Greek yogurt with some natural pb, chia seeds, and a dash of THM Sweet Blend.  Supper was small because we would be going out to eat after church that night with our visiting preachers.  I had one low carb tortilla with salsa chicken, shredded cheese, and sour cream.  Salsa chicken is simply chicken in the crockpot with a taco seasoning pack and salsa on top.  Cook it all day and then shred the chicken with a fork and serve as tacos or taco salad.  Went to Denny's after church, and I have to admit the food looked yummy.  To stick with low carb, though, I ordered a steak with sauteed zucchini and squash and got steamed broccoli instead of rice.

Thursday was a super busy day!  It was our first day of homeschool co-op for the year.  I'm teaching the preK thru K class.  I had to prepare for that class, plus I had to help each of my kids pack their backpacks with things necessary for their classes.  Even though my 2 skillets were dirty and I was in a big hurry, I was determined to have a low carb breakfast!  I soft boiled 2 eggs, added 1/2 TBSP butter and 2 turkey sausage links and mashed and stirred.  Voila!  Drank coffee with cream.

Just as I was about to walk out the door to mail out an ebay sale, my neighbor lady walked up onto the porch.  She needed a phonebook, which I have no clue where that is because hubby was the last to use it and didn't put it back.  I invited her in so I could search the internet for the phone number.  Mortified.  My house was NOT visitor friendly since we have been running like mad for 2 weeks solid!  She told me she had locked herself out of her house and her car and needed to cancel her dr's appointment.  Plus, she was sick and it was 95 and humid today.  She called her doctor's office, and then I asked her if I could try to break in her house for her.  LOL  Every pastor's wife knows how to break into houses, right?  Ha!  She said that I could try.  I was able to get it open with my library card after just a minute of trying.  She gave me a big hug and I was on my way.

So we were just a couple minutes late for homeschool co-op.  I'm not the teacher until after lunch, thankfully.  We had over 70 kids there this year, not counting parents!  Craziness!!!  Last year we only had like 30 kids.  Lots of parents had pulled their kids from public school and just started homeschooling, so today was kind of crowded and crazy but fun!

I only packed us snacks for lunch, because we were taking the preachers out for lunch as soon as co-op was over.  I had a cheese stick and a beef stick with water.

Shoney's was chosen for lunch.  I ate grilled salmon with the veggie medley and a salad.  It was really good salmon.  Glad I got that instead of beef again.

I ate 2 Dove Dark Chocolate pieces this afternoon, just to be honest!  That was 9 carbs according to the package serving and division.  ;)  I drank some almond coconut milk with it and also had just maybe 1/2 TBSP of natural pb.  

Tonight I got all thrown off because we planned to take the preachers to Denny's again, but both of them preferred to just go on to their rooms and rest tonight.  We were very hungry and hadn't eaten, so we weren't sure what to do.  Hubby said Wendy's, and as soon as I heard that I knew I was getting the #1 combo.  :::sigh:::  Old demons die hard!  I also had a small choc frosty.


But I went nearly 3 full days of low carb before having a slip-up this time.  I'm making little improvements, right?!  To my surprise, eating low carb hasn't been nearly as hard as I thought it would be.  At first, I kept telling myself I didn't want to do it because I couldn't eat fruits.  Then I pointed out to myself that I never eat fruit when I'm eating all junky and terrible, so what's the difference?  So in lieu of fruits, I try to aim for veggies at every opportunity.

So there's the update I knew you were all dying for, unable to sleep waiting for, and are so glad to have gotten.  Haha  Despite ending the day on a bad note, I am overall proud of myself and the self control I have been exhibiting for more than 2-hour increments.  Seriously.  Lol   Goodnight!

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Yesterday and Today

Yesterday was Monday.  I did NOT have a low-carb day at all.  In fact, it was the polar opposite.  Nothing went right.  I think I mentioned that my cell phone is messed up.  Well, I stayed up way too late scouring the internet for solutions or replacements.  Woke up Monday morning and began looking on the Verizon site.  Nowhere near my upgrade date.  :-/  I was about to give up hope and succumb to putting one on a credit card.  The cheapest basic phone I could get, without it being time to renew, was $149.99.  The only one my store had in stock was $199.99.  Yuck.  Why do I have such bad luck with phones???

In the end, I put a post on fb stating what had happened and asking if anyone had a basic phone I could have or buy from them.  A girl I know said she had one that she was no longer using, had upgraded to a smart phone, and she wanted to give it to me because it was free when she got it.  I picked it up from her this morning, and she still had the FedEx box it was delivered in with the manual, charger, and all.  Wow.  It is a flip phone with a full keyboard, and everything is in a slightly different place.  Texting is slow going for now, but I'm happy to have a fully working phone!

I got my permanent crown this morning.  While at the dentist, my crazy other phone kept turning itself off and on.  Lol  I explained to the staff that I was NOT being rude and playing with my phone.  After the appointment is when I got the "new" old phone.  I'm so thankful that I didn't have to spend a dime!

So anyway, Monday was a flop.  I actually didn't feel guilty for it, though.  It was a crazy day, out of the house a lot, which wasn't planned, and I did have two good low-carb days the two previous days.  I had no breakfast, an Arby's sandwich for lunch but no fries, and grilled cheeseburgers for supper with chips and baked pole green beans.  I did make a dessert, called Rolo Brownies.  It's a recipe from back when I sold Pampered Chef.  Somehow, I only ate 2 brownies.  Instead of skim milk, I drank my almond coconut milk.  I'm in no way claiming this was a good eating day, but it could've been WAY worse.  Another plus is that we wrapped up the leftover brownies in packages and gave some to neighbors.  So now they are outta here!

Today, though, I jumped right back into low carb.  I knew it would be tempting to grab some breakfast while out and alone at 8:00.  So while getting ready, I promised the Lord I would come home and eat scrambled eggs.  So I did.  I had that along with turkey sausage links and mixed squash and peppers cooked in coconut oil and drank some coffee with cream.

For lunch, I made the kids whole wheat spaghetti.  For myself, I cooked a fresh salmon fillet and some spaghetti squash.  Then I made up an alfredo sauce with Laughing Cow, cream cheese, heavy cream, and seasonings.  Then I cooked 4 Brussels sprouts and tossed those in, too.  Delicious.  I really, really never knew how much I loved salmon.

Later in the day, I had some almonds for a snack.

Supper was a beef roast with carrots, celery, and radishes instead of potatoes.  I also had green beans.  Hubby and the kids had some mac and cheese, but I didn't take one bite.  We all lived without dinner rolls and drank water.  :)

My husband had to go mow the church grass, so I stayed home and sat outside and watched the kids play what they called basketball.  Lol  I got a bit hungry, so I grabbed a 0% plain Greek yogurt.  I knew that would be gross, so I put some natural peanut butter, chia seeds, and a sprinkle of the Trim Healthy Mama sweet blend.  Now that I could live with!  I actually liked it.  I think technically I'm not supposed to do much of the erythritol/stevia blend, but right now I'm really only concerned with an honest effort, not perfection or rigidness of rules.  I am sure I will bend and break the rules plenty.

Oh, I did have one Dove dark chocolate square today either before or after lunch.  That tad of chocolate is just really amazing for me.  Lol  I always buy it and say I'll just have one or two and then go haywire, but now that I had hubby hide it all is well.

Right now, I'm drinking some unsweetened almond coconut milk - probably 4 to 6 oz.  I am so happy that I found a milk substitute that has zero net carbs and a taste I can enjoy.  I did really good with water intake today, too.

Tomorrow starts revival at our church, so I'm not sure how much I will be able to blog over the next few days.  I am really going to put forth effort during this time.  We will be taking the guest preachers out to eat for two meals a day - usually late afternoon and then after the evening church service.  I'm sure I will have one day of not doing low carb, but I'm really, really going to try to make this work at least two of the next three days!  It was so exciting to see 4.5 pounds gone in 2 days.  I didn't weigh this morning, though, because I didn't want to see how much came back.  Haha  Talk with y'all soon!

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Two Days of Low Carb Eating

I am still conflicted about dieting, eating programs, and what to do!  Obviously, I don't have enough self control to do WW anymore... at least not right now.  I think it's GREAT that you can eat whatever you want with WW, but right now I'm having huge food issues.  I can't stop at a normal serving, and having one bad thing just makes me want another.  So trying to count points lasted all of two days.  Yeah, nice.

So then I went a few more days with no restrictions at all.  That's not gonna work, no way.  I finally just stopped and prayed.  I admitted to the Lord that I know what I'm doing to myself.  I just don't understand WHY I'm doing it since I know better.  So I just prayed and asked for help.  I didn't make any specific vows or commitments.  I just needed to pray and vent and get everything out that was on my heart.

I decided to try low carb on Friday.  I did great with breakfast!  And then I failed.  NOTHING went right on Friday.  Nothing.  So things just got pushed aside and I told myself I'd start "tomorrow."

Thankfully, I actually did start on Saturday.  I had scrambled eggs and sausage for breakfast.  Lunch was grilled bbq chicken legs, half an ear of corn on the cob, and some oven baked pole beans with seasonings.  Now technically, I'm sure the chicken legs weren't officially low carb because of the bbq sauce.  And I looked up the carbs in corn before eating, so that's why I cut my ear in half.  But I did start BEFORE going to the grocery store and already had that meal planned for the day.  Kudos to me for not putting things off yet another day because everything wasn't perfect.

I didn't have an official supper because I was out grocery shopping.  I didn't know what to do, but I knew I didn't want to mess up!  So I got some almonds, beef jerky, and a cheese stick and ate that (only about 1/4 pack of the almonds).  When I got home that night, I had a spoonful of natural peanut butter with some of the stuff I'm gonna tell you about next.

I could not STAND almond milk when I did Trim Healthy Mama.  Grossed me out so bad!  But last night I picked up some Almond Breeze unsweetened almond AND coconut milk mixture.  I love it!  Sure, it has a different aftertaste than milk. But it is actually milk-like in texture.  I can't tell you how much I hated almond milk.  I tried to like it.  I would buy it and it would ruin.  Blech.  So if you hated it, too, but like coconut try the blend.  Zero net carbs for 1 whole cup, and it has double the calcium as milk.  I was surprised!

This morning I made 2 eggs fried in coconut oil and 2 turkey sausage links.  Had my coffee with cream.  Lunch was pork bbq that I rolled up in a low-carb tortilla with mayo and jalapenos.  My sides were broccoli and cheese and fried radishes with onion.  I really enjoyed that meal.  Tonight, I had tuna salad (tuna, eggs, mayo), cheese, and pork rinds.  Hey - they're low carb!  I only had about 7 pieces.

I had a mega huge craving come over me.  I told my husband to give me ONE dove dark chocolate piece (he hid them at my request).  I savored that thing, and even after one day of no sweets it tasted more flavorful.  I drank the almond/coconut milk with it.  Then I had decaf coffee with some of that in it, too.  I drank a good amount of water today as well.

Overall, I'm pleased with yesterday and today.  I sure hope to get back to the gym this week.  My son is mostly better.  He went two nights with no breathing treatments but had to have one tonight after playing outside after church.

It poured the rain here last night while I was grocery shopping.  The wind nearly jerked my umbrella away.   When getting out of the van, I heard something hit the ground.  My phone had fallen out of my purse! I don't have a smart phone, but still.  I grabbed it up immediately and it seemed fine.  I didn't take it apart, though, and I guess I should've.  Sometime during the night the screen went black.  I can send and receive calls and even receive texts, but I can't see who is calling or texting.  Ugh.  I'm not due for an upgrade until 06/2015.  Not good.  I found an old phone here at home that I hope will work for switching service to.

You can have that last, totally unrelated paragraph for free.  No charge.  So that's all for now!

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Busy Busy and Asthma Issues

Goodness, NOTHING ever goes as planned.  I was so excited after exercising on Monday!  I had found a time when I could go to the gym during the day, take the kids, and the gym was completely uncrowded.  Hubby and son left for Louisville, KY that afternoon for a church meeting and would be gone overnight and most of the next day.  We females had a girl's night.  I cooked supper at home, and we watched some things on YouTube together.  We stayed up past midnight playing Uno and all slept in the same room.  It was a good night.

So of course we all slept in on Tuesday morning.  I had to run out to the pharmacy for DM, so we had lunch at Arby's.  After I took the meds to DMs house is when I noticed that he had overdosed on pills (posted about that Tuesday).  I did end up speaking with his nurse.  He stopped all BP meds for that day but was to begin them again Wednesday morning.  I ended up having to make three trips out for DM on Tuesday.  It threw my entire day off.  Instead of making salmon for supper, I came home to a kitchen that needed major cleanup and threw my hands up and ordered pizza to be delivered.  It was 8:00 pm when it came.  We just had a really, really, LONG day on Tuesday.

So to top it off, hubby and son (age 5) get home at almost 9:00 pm Tuesday.  Son was coughing a lot and audibly wheezing.  He hasn't had issues with asthma in over 2 years, but the last few months he's had issues.  So I grabbed our Proventil inhaler, and the wheezing stopped with that.  He still didn't sound good, though.  I stayed up until nearly 1:00 am near his room listening to him.  I finally went to hubby and asked him to bring son to the pallet in our bedroom.  Laid him there, and he sounded worse than ever.  So we put him between us in bed.  He was breathing so fast, not normal at all.  You could hear every breath, and if his body tried to take a deep breath he would cough.  His cough sounded like there was so much mucus that he was choking on it.  I prayed for the Lord to give me wisdom to know whether to go to the ER or not.  We are not ones to run to the ER for no reason.

I took son's temp, and it was 99.9.  Not bad, but still a temp.  I asked him how he felt, and he said dizzy.  That worried me for air supply.  Then I asked him to take a deep breath, and he said he couldn't because his cough wouldn't let him.  Awww, poor guy.  I hopped out of bed, put my contacts back in, dressed, and headed out the door with my sick boy.  Got to the ER at 1:30 am.  They didn't even take us to triage.  Saw his chest working so hard and took us straight back.  Speediest ER service I've ever had.  Lol  He got liquid steroids and a breathing treatment and was much improved.  And wired from the steroids.  :-/  He wooed the nurse into giving him a pair of gloves and a doctor's mask.  Stinker!  He ran in the door at 3:30 am and pounced on his daddy and told him all about his wonderful ER experience.  Ha

So it was a long night.  Couldn't go to the gym on Wednesday because, of course, sick kids aren't allowed in the daycare.

Today (Thursday), son had a followup visit at 11:00 and DM a GI consult at 2:15.  My poor little guy still sounded back.  He had another breathing treatment in the office, and we now own a nebulizer machine and meds.  :::sigh:::  I just hate that, but I'm glad that in the future I can help him instead of running to the ER.

Met hubby for lunch between appointments because there wasn't time to go home and then trek back out.  Had a "real" meal because hubby had to preach in a prison about 40 minutes away from the house tonight, so we wouldn't be able to have supper with him leaving early and me getting home late.

Then it was off to Disabled Man's consult, which took FOR EV ER.  But the doctor was super nice.  It's going to be a nightmare to get DM to understand clear liquids, no meds, etc, etc, for the upcoming colonoscopy.  Bless him.  I have to tell him stuff 473 times before he understands.  :)  His BP was only 92/56 today, so too low for him.  Not sure if that is still an effect from taking the wrong meds Tuesday or what.

Next I had to go to the pharmacy for meds for son before coming home.  I had the kids clean up some messes, and I'm about to work on some myself!  Over the last few days, we've been having school curriculum that we've ordered come in the mail.  I feel like there are boxes wherever I look!

I stayed up late last night making our school schedule.  I was even able to schedule in my gym time.  I'm excited about implementing the schedule and seeing what needs tweaked.  I love/hate schedules.  I'm such a free spirit, but life runs so much smoother on a schedule with all these children!

So there is my "no-progress-has-been-made and everything-went-wrong" update.  What else is new?!  Next week isn't going to slow down much, but hopefully no surprises will be thrown in and things can be semi-ok!

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Bigtime Random

I just realized I never posted pics of Disabled Man's bday celebration with us.  Gee, I'm "only" a month and 4 days late.  Lol  Anyway, I'm just worried about him right now.  Went by his apartment to put some medicine in his med box for the week and noticed he had accidentally taken Tuesday morning AND Wednesday morning meds today instead of Tues morning and Tues afternoon.   Ughhh.  That means he overdosed on 2 psych meds, 2 reflux meds, and 2 blood pressure pills (the most concerning to me).  Glad I went by or he would probably have taken his noon pills as well, which would've been another BP pill of a different kind.  Ugh.  His blood sugar was over 400 yesterday evening, and for lunch today he was having grapes and a WW ice cream bar.  I have tried and tried to help him understand he just can't eat fruits and sweets for meals.  He is insulin dependent.  He has home health nurses coming in twice a week.  I'm feeling he's at a point where he needs more help than I can give him.  :-/  Only he can't get that help because he can't afford it but isn't poor enough to get it free.  I have called his doctor's office and left a message with all this info for his nurse.  Just waiting for a call back.

So here is DM enjoying his special attention!

We had a picture of him and his pet bird blown up and framed.  He loved it.  He used to have a bird for a pet, but he had to give it away because he couldn't take care of it.  Plus, he's a chain smoker so that poor bird!  Lol  My mother-in-law took in the bird so he can still see it occasionally. 

We also gave him some spray on cologne (he likes to pretty much bath in it, lol) and a couple odds and ends things.

Anyway, I talk about Disabled Man a lot, so I just wanted to share with you.  :)

Monday, August 18, 2014

To the Gym We Go

Despite having friends with us on Sunday and taking them out for lunch, I still did great with choosing my food.  And even though my kitchen looked like it had blown up yesterday and I barely got to clean it before heading back to church Sunday night, I threw stuff in the crockpot on high for chili that night as planned.  Then he dessert demon took hold.  Before I knew it, I was making no-bake cookies.  After I made them, however, I walked away and got on the computer for a few minutes.  I think walking away for a few minutes helped how I handled the situation. I ended up going back into the kitchen and having 3-1/2 cookies and milk, but this is an improvement over how many I would normally eat.  At this point, any improvement is good.  I decided to track points for my slip-up and move forward.

Okay, people.  The sun no longer shines at 5;30 am.  When I joined the gym, birds were loudly chirping and the sun was brightly glaring into my bedroom window.  About 2 weeks ago, it was mostly dark when I attempted to get up.  This morning, 5:30 am was completely pitch black.  I know me well enough to know I am NOT going to get up in dark weather unless it's to be at the hospital for an induction of a baby.  Lol  Plus, how miserable will it be at 5:30 am in the winter?!  No thanks.

I decided right then - around 5:40 am  ;) - that I was going to have to find another time to go to the gym.  I do WANT to go.  I just feel so silly at the gym.  I mean, it feels like only fit people should be in a gym.  But that's silly!  I'm so comfortable with my 6-7 am time frame that anything else felt scary.  I had to conquer that today.

I loaded the kids up a bit before noon.  Daycare closed at 1:00 pm.  There were 2 small children in there.  I informed the lady that I homeschool, so that's why I had older kids needing daycare.  She was just a young girl, maybe 20 tops.  My kids said she was nice.  She carried the little baby around and then would go about sweeping and cleaning.  The kids had a blast.  When I went to get them from the room, my son was on plastic roller skates and didn't want to leave.  Lol  The daycare is a glass room, so there is no privacy between the kids and the worker.  Also, the only door to the place is only half a door, so you can always see in the door, too.  I really like that.

I had intentions to walk the treadmill a bit, do my arm exercises, and then cool down on the bike.  Well, some show about remodeling houses was on and I got enthralled in that.  I stayed on the treadmill at varying speeds for 53 minutes and burned 292 calories.  Not bad!  I'm glad something decent and interesting was on for me to watch.  I was worried I would be bored without a book to take along.  I need to go to the library.

We came home for lunch and had Smart Ones burgers.  I promised hubby that going to the gym at a different time of day would not mean eating out for lunch.  So now I just have to revise a homeschool schedule that allows for taking time out for the gym.  And I will have to preplan lunches really well so I can buy simple items or make ahead our lunches.

So that is how it has been going over Sunday and so far Monday.  It's not as good as I would've hoped for, but it's better than nothing at all.  And it's a start.  :)

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Back to Reality

Got up on Tuesday morning and checked out of the hotel.  Skipped breakfast completely because we slept in and then had to pack and get our stuff out of the room.  We decided to try Flapjacks for our meal.  We've been told it is good but never ate there before.  Hubby got Cinnamon Roll Pancakes along with some sides, and I ordered Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Chocolate Chip Pancakes and an omelet.  It was only 2 pancakes, but I couldn't dare eat them all.  Reread the name.  They were super rich.  Whew!  You didn't use syrup on them because the peanut butter was made into a sauce/syrup for them.  I ate about 1-1/2 and then close to 3/4 of my omelet and called it quits.

After we finished eating, we were trying to find a putt-putt place to enjoy.  My brother sent me a text to say the area where my dad had his defibrillator/pacemaker placed was swollen very badly.  He had just been to the doctor for his post-op checkup the day before.  I guess that's how things go!  Since Mom had the kids, my brother took Dad to his cardiologist.  At first, they considered sending him to the ER.  Then they decided he just had a hematoma. Since things were in limbo about what they were going to do, the hubs and I played one round of putt-putt somewhere and headed towards my parents instead of spending most of the day in Pigeon Forge as planned.

Got a call on the way to Mom and Dad's that he was sent home to apply ice and compression, go to ER if worse.  Mom was too squeamish to apply pressure to the area because poor Daddy would holler out in pain.  But I love medical stuff, so I stayed strong and made him suffer through the 5-minute compressions.  I google searched and saw that sometimes heat can be used for a hematoma, so I started alternating moist heat and compression with an ice pack immediately after.  I did this until 3:00 am.  When we got up the next morning, the hematoma was nearly gone.  Yayyy!  So glad God worked it out for me to be there for my parents on that day.  Mom gets frazzled and neither of my parents tend to obey doctor's orders very well.  Lol

We spent Tuesday evening with my parents and all had breakfast together Wednesday morning.  We packed up and started towards home.  We ate once we got back into our hometown and then came home to get ready for our Wednesday evening church service.  We had a great little getaway.

Thursday was our actual 15th anniversary.  My mother-in-law watched the kids for us while we went to eat Mexican and share some Marble Slab ice cream.

Now life is back to normal - laundry, dishes, homeschooling, kids being kids, chaos, and messes.  Lol  Today (Friday), we had a receiving friends and a birthday party to attend.  Tomorrow, I have to get all our shopping done, Disabled Man's shopping done, and we have friends coming in and staying over through Sunday morning and going to church with us.

I am going to put effort into my eating and exercising this week.  Things have been totally abandoned with so much stuff coming up or schedules conflicting or traveling.  I *think* I am going to try counting points again.  I don't know.  It just seems like it should be SO EASY.  But I manage to always mess it up.  I guess I just have so much faith in WW because it's how I lost weight the first time around.  At least I'm not paying for meetings or online WW or anything, so I'm not throwing money away.

I have had a two-week break from the pool.  This week was understandable, but last week just sorta happened.  I went Monday, and that was it.  The good thing about the break is that now I don't feel obligated to go and swim because it is social time.  Love getting to know the ladies in the pool from 6-7 am, but it's becoming more of talk time than exercise time.  Plus, it gets old changing out of soaking wet clothes every morning.  I am going to try doing treadmill, bike, or machines on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and pool on Tuesday and Thursday.  If I get bored with that and want to switch up and do MWF pool on some weeks, then I will.  I just don't want to burn myself out on any one thing.  I also need to go ahead and have my second free session with the trainer.  So maybe I could do one day of legs and one day of arms in my MWF mix. 

I really feel disgusted with myself.  Clothes are starting to feel tighter.  AGAIN.  And I already bought a new size up starting last fall.  It has to stop.  I have noticed feeling short of breath after walking distances that shouldn't be that difficult for a person my age - if I were healthy.  I have splurged on just about every food my heart could desire over the last couple months - sort of in a state of rebellion, I guess.  Ended up being kind of a good thing.  Stuff doesn't sound good anymore.  Brownies, cakes, cookies, burgers, fries, pizza - all of that has lost its appeal to me.  They served pizza tonight at the birthday party and I could barely eat two slices.  My body is over it and is letting me know!  So I'm hoping with that mentality, I can make some progress this time around.  I've got to try a million times if need be.

Oh, I also watched a show called My 600-pound Life on TLC while on our little vacation.  Wow.  I am very far from that now, but anything could become a reality.  I feel so bad for those people.  If I feel out of breath now, no wonder they can't even walk to the bathroom!  :(  I have to admit it was motivational, and it was kinda sad that several of the people didn't get or keep their weight off after having the gastric bypass because their HABITS and FOOD ADDICTIONS were so overpowering.  Kinda makes me shudder.  I'm gonna have to do this with the Lord's help.  Obviously, I can't do this in my own strength.  I tend to want to do it WITHOUT God because if I involved Him, then I am bound to something for real.  Like no diet drinks for the entire year of 2014.  What was I thinking???  Lol

Well, sadly this is reality!  Going shopping tomorrow and going to make a game plan of food and meals that I can live with.  It needs to be food I will actually eat (not buy with good intentions and then it either rots or I give it away) and something that is not difficult.  I'm way too busy for anything too time consuming.  Here's to (another) new start!